Becky Miller

Before The Work found me, I used to beat myself up with my thoughts:
“I’m not good enough.”
“No one loves me.”
“I did something wrong.”
“Something bad is going to happen.”

These thoughts were a burden that weighed me down, like little bowling balls I carried with me wherever I went. They crushed my spirit and made it impossible to like myself. I didn’t wonder whether they were true; they were my “reality.”

Then I read Loving What Is, by Byron Katie, learned a new skill called The Work, and my experience of reality has never been the same. Because now I know what to do about my bowling balls: I question them.

What a huge difference four little questions can make in your life! With them I have solved every type of personal problem, from tiny annoyances to my most shameful secrets. By letting go of bowling balls I had carried for decades, I walk this earth a little lighter. When I asked my sweet husband if he could describe the difference between the present me and the “before The Work me,” he said, “That’s easy. You’re a happy person now.”

I became a Certified Facilitator of The Work because the only thing more fun than doing The Work by myself is doing it with another person. As part of my training, I have been privileged to sit with hundreds of clients, and every one of them has been my teacher. When a stressful thought “shifts” in a client as we sit in The Work, it shifts in me as well, because we all have the same problems. My shift is an extra gift I receive as the facilitator.

I have retired from a 30-year career as a corporate paralegal, where I spent my days writing contracts, to devote the rest of my days to “playing” in The Work. Because although the thoughts we do the work on can be very painful, I see it as fun. We go down into our darkest holes (our stressful thoughts) ask the 4 questions, find the turnarounds, and somehow, as if by magic, we turn our tears into laughter. I can’t imagine anything more fun than that.

What are your bowling balls? Write down the stressful thoughts you carry around that weigh you down and keep you from living a happy life. What would it feel like to let go of even one of them?

I invite you to play in The Work with me and find out. It is my passion to share The Work with adults, kids, families and groups. I especially love working with couples because I get a huge kick out of watching two people fall madly back in love with each other.

Please check out my website at Playinthework.com for a complete description of my Services, Meetups, and Workshops. See you on the playground!