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Kelly Stubbs

I first started The Work in 2009 through reading the book Loving What Is. After about a year of sitting in The Work on my own, I saw the School for The Work advertised in the back of Loving What Is, and I went. I didn’t know anyone who was doing The Work and knew nothing more than what I read in Loving What Is. The School opened my mind and heart in ways I had not experienced previously. It felt like I cried for nine days questioning stories about my family that had been creating so much suffering inside of me. After the School, I joined The Institute for the Work and began sitting in The Work as my daily meditation practice. My life has changed in ways that feel miraculous and in ways I could never have imagined.

Before the work, I experienced myself being triggered easily. I would get hurt and angry and do or say something that left me feeling ashamed. The attack would go out to others and then come back at me with such force that I was left feeling unlovable and unworthy.

After sitting in The Work, I notice that as I question the thoughts that are outward attacks, they lose their intensity and, as Katie says, “they let go of me.” I am much less likely to act in ways that leave me feeling ashamed. And, if I do react in a way that doesn’t feel right inside of me, I am learning to hold myself with such loving kindness, a kind of compassion for myself that I never thought possible. I noticed a belief at some point that I had to attack myself to make sure that I didn’t act out and what I have come to know is that this is not true. Holding myself with gentleness translates to holding everyone and everything with that same gentleness.

Since sitting in this work most days for eleven years, all my relationships, including the one with myself, have become kinder, more connected and a continued source of discovery. The Work is an ongoing practice for me and as I question my thinking, I discover my heart again and again.

My Master’s degree and background are in mental health counseling where I worked in various settings. For many years now I have been a stay-at-home Mom. I am also a TriYoga practitioner and mixed media artist/art journaler. I find these practices support my daily practice in The Work and I enjoy finding ways to combine fine art and The Work.

Some of the areas I have explored through my own work are: Female Emotional Pain/Gender Roles, Self-Attack/Shame, Loneliness, Parenting and Parents, Siblings, Abandonment, Creativity, Fear of Public Speaking, Money, Body/Repulsion, Aging, The Worst that could happen.

I love to do The Work on any issue with individuals and groups, in person or by Skype or Zoom.

The Work is a miracle in my life, and I look forward to continuing my journey in The Work and sharing it with you.

Virginia, USA
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